Sleeping Kenshin
by Aurorawhisperwind
Summary: Yep, and he’s a beauty!
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own Ruroni Kenshin or the millions of other fairy tale characters. Now leave me alone!

Aurora Whisperwind: This is my first fic so please be a little kind!

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Once upon a time (as all fairy tales go), in the fair land of Tokyo, there lived a poor young girl, a girl who lived with her stepmother and two stepsisters (all three were evil of course).This poor young girl's name was Kaoru kamiya. (Forget bout the other three. I don't know what their names were.)So, anyway Kaoru lived quite a miserable life, she didn't even have mice or dogs or birds or a horse as her friends.

What she did have though, was a grumbling, insulting, talking cat named Yahiko-in-boots. Yahiko-in-boots was a lazy, old, thing she had found on the streets. Now Kaoru regretted ever taking him in. He had weaseled out new boots and a hat out of her and as repayment; he had done nothing at all except call her "Busu!" So Kaoru grew more and more miserable than ever.

Until one day she heard a magnificent tale being told, a tale about a handsome prince named Kenshin Himura, who was apparently cursed by an evil wizard called uh, something. Now this wizard hated Prince Kenshin, as he envied his good looks and charming smile (not to mention the cute "oro"!).

And so prince Kenshin was in an enchanted sleep, locked away in a tower in the middle of the dark forest and though the story didn't mention anything about him being waking up until love's first kiss or anything, Kaoru decided to give it a shot. She thus, alas, missed the part of the story where the enormous, fire breathing dragon, Megumi (sorry, Megumi fans but I really couldn't think of anyone else) and the fiery volcano and the rickety bridge upon which the tower was located, was mentioned.

So Kaoru escaped one dark night, from her abusive Home, Yahiko-in-boots had followed her.

"I'll be of great use to you, Busu!"

Kabong

"Ouch! Whacha do that for Busu?"

"Serves you right, you filthy cat!"

But Kaoru knew that he wouldn't be able to live with her stinky family so she knew she had to take him along (sigh). And so (After that minor interruption) they set off on an adventure of a lifetime (thank their ignorance of the dragon and the numerous other problems). So anyway my friends, this is their tale in full!

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Authors notes: So, how was it? I know it isn't that funny but I'm setting the stage. Comments and flames are welcome. Push that review button! 


	2. LOST?

Aurora Whisperwind: Hi, again people! Thanks to the reviewers who were **sooooo** sweet! Now I'm sorry if you don't like the choice of the characters, but I tried to do the best I could. Once again, comments and flames are welcome. Thank you!

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or the fairy tale characters (blah, blah, blah)

There! Now I can write in peace.

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"I'm free! Free at last! Free to make my own choices! Free to go anywhere I want! Free to save the handsome prince Kenshin!"

"Sorry for interrupting your ode to your own liberation, Busu, but where the HECK are we headed off to?"

"Miserable cat! To the dark forest of course! "

"And do you know the _way_?"

"How am I supposed to know? I thought _you_ knew!"

"How would I know, woman? I'm only a cat!"

"How would _I_ know?"

"Great! Now we're right in the middle of nowhere, with no idea where we're going and on top of that, with no food _or_ money! And this is all entirely your fault!"

"My fault! Why you lousy, miserable…."

Thump

Yahiko-in-boots ducked to avoid the rock thrown at him by the glowering Kaoru and opened his mouth to insult her again but his words were cut off by a _croak_.

"Hey, you're supposed to throw a ball, not a rock you MORON!"-came a shout from behind the bush and out jumped a frog. "Anyway…" The frog stopped as it stared at a messy young girl and a cat in boots.

"Where's the prince?"

"What prince?"

"Well, you know the story, a prince kisses the frog and it turns into a princess, they marry and live happily ever after…"

"I've heard of it, alright. Only it was a prince who was the frog _and_ there was no kissing!"-Yahiko-in-boots said.

"Foolish cat, but what would you know…So anyway where is the prince?"

"How would we know?"

"Well….you were talking about one…"

"You were _spying_ on us?"

"Well…."-she said, twiddling her green thumbs "I was hoping…"

"But this prince is mine!"-said Kaoru.

"Alright, alright you can have this prince Kenshin guy but he must have a brother or some one whom I can have"

"Well I suppose so…"

"Great! I'll join you then! I'm going to turn human! Woo Hoo!"

'Yeah, right which abysmal idiot will kiss a frog?'-Thought Yahiko-in-boots.

"So, anyway, what's your name?"

"Oh, so sorry I forgot. My name is Misao Toadstool!."

She hopped off. Kaoru and Yahiko-in-boots stared at each other in disbelief and set off on a run behind the frog.

"So, what you say is…"-Began Kaoru, "You were cursed by someone?"

"Cursed! No, who the heck can curse me the indestructible Misao?"

Kaoru fell over (Anime style)

"Then how will you turn human? You need to be a human before, for anything to happen"

"Rubbish! I'll turn human, you'll see. So where are you off to?"

"To the dark forest"-Kaoru said drowning out the 'Hah!' of Yahiko-in-boots.

"Great! So where is that place?"

"Oh great! Now I'm stuck with _two_ frogs with no sense of direction!"

Twin cries of-"You little twirp! I'm gonna kill you…"-filled the air as a furious fight erupted. Clods of dust flew. Yep, this was gonna be one _looong_ journey

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Al right, I know Misao can't be a frog but she seemed sooo right for the part!

Anyways tell me what you think. Read and review please!


	3. The Allknowingseer?

Aurora Whisperwind: Wow! Five reviews!(Dancing madly around) I never thought anybody would read this thing: )

Anyways, thank you to all the reviewers who took the time for this. I really appreciate it! So, on with the fic! (Sano's making his appearance here)

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or the fairy tale characters. (WHY do I have to say this? HOW can they possibly expect me to make money outta this? )

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The battle for Yahiko's head was still going on until-

"Hey, you lot down there!"

Kaoru and Misao immediately stopped to look up while Yahiko-in-boots made his escape out of their combined grips. A kinda weird looking guy in leprechaunish clothes towered over them.

"What are you guys staring at? Haven't you ever seen a man before?"-More staring continued, this time with raised eyebrows. A man, huh, hmm…. Yahiko was the first to speak up-"Who are you?"

"That's exactly what I came over here to ask you guys about!"-he said, with a stupid grin on his face. "What the hell do you mean by that? How can you not know who you are?"-asked Kaoru who in the meantime had grabbed Yahiko again and was slowly squeezing the life outta him.

"Oh I know _who _I am alright! I'm Sano! But I don't know my name"

"Isn't Sano your name?"

"Nope, it's not my full name atleast, actually I was on my way to the All-Knowing-Seer if he knew anything when I saw you lot"-"So, do ya have anything to eat? I'm starved!"

"The All-Knowing-Seer? Who's that?"-asked Misao while Yahiko and Kaoru started another scuffle.

"Oh he's this guy who knows everything"-"So, anything to eat, eh?"

"That's obvious! Hey, Kaoru, maybe he'll know how to get to the dark forest"-Kaoru let go of Yahiko-in-boots who ran off to a good distance now, and thought for a while. "Yeah, why not? Hey Sano, can we join you?"

"Sure! So you have anything to eat?"-All three of them looked at each other. It _was _beginning to get dark. "I didn't need to bring any food. There are loads of flies here"-pointed out Misao who promptly unrolled her tongue and started catching them. "Yuck that's disgusting Misao! Go eat somewhere else!"-"Alright!"-she said and started hopping happily around. "Yeah, now her odds of getting _kissed_ by a prince have gone up to about a one to a million"-quipped Yahiko who sat down and started repairing his feather which had gotten badly injured during the battle. "My poor feather, it's ruined! This is all your fault, stupid Busu!"

"MY FAULT! Why you little-"

"Ahem, something to eat please?"-said Sano and released Yahiko out of Kaoru's deathly grip. Yahiko promptly returned to his beloved hat.

"I guess I'll cook something for us, then. Get some firewood, Yahiko"-demanded Kaoru. Yahiko stopped mourning his battered feather to look up at her with indescribable horror in his eyes. He tried to say something, choked, spluttered, and swooned. "What's with him?"-Questioned Sano while Kaoru started to swell like a bullfrog-"Is he good to eat?"-he asked and sniffed at Yahiko-in-boots. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! What, are you _nuts_? Cat killer! Help, someone! There's a psycho on the loose! He's a raving lunatic! Hel-"his words were cut off by Kaoru who grabbed him and clamped her hand over his mouth and ordered Sano to get the firewood.

An hour later….

Yahiko had recovered from his hysterical fit and Kaoru had finished her, uh, _fabulous _dinner. "I'll take mine aside to cool,"-said Yahiko and was back minutes later with grass and mud and something else which looked curiously like a worm on his plate. "Are you crazy? Why did you throw the food away? And why are you eating _that_ stuff?"-asked Sano. "Trust me, there's not much difference between Kaoru's cooking and this. Infact, this is probably much better!" Sano shrugged and had a bite-and spat it out. His face went white, then green. "You have any more of that delicious looking grass?"

Finally dinner was finished and everyone lay down to sleep, thinking their own thoughts. Misao dreamed of a handsome prince. Yahiko wondered if this prince Kenshin guy could cook. Sano pondered over his missing name and whether this All-knowing seer could help, while Kaoru thought about the funny looking mounds a little away from their camp which looked suspiciously like her food. Hey, wait a second, that was…………………

Let us draw a curtain of ignominy on the ensuing violence.

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So, what do you guys think? Something about this chap is not quite right for me……

Anyways, about this All-knowing-seer, I'm giving you three guesses! Big clue-He's gonna be _very _irritating, Ha Ha! (Hey that's not a clue, that's……)

Comments and flames are welcome; I would love to hear from you all. Read and review please!

To sueb262: Thank you for the advice! I tried to implement it in this chap, plz tell me if it's alright!

To lolo popoki: Thank you for reviewing again!

To everyone else, thank you!


	4. OMG Check out the redhead!

Aurora Whisperwind: Hi guys! Thank you for reviewing . I love this chapter and I hope you do, too!

Disclaimer: I just took over the world, so I own Rurouni Kenshin! You will bow to me now, the new ruler of the universe!So there!

Yahiko: Aaaw, shut up you old cow!

Aurora Whisperwind: Why you little….Wait a sec…I've a better idea. Your life is ruined in this chap, cat! Muhuhahahaha!

Yahiko:WHAT? NOOOOOOOOO!

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It was a beautiful morning! The sun was shining! The birds were singing! The scent of fresh blooming flowers filled the air as a happy little frog bounced around followed by three not so happy figures. Kaoru was still upset over her dumped cooking and Sano and Yahiko-in-boots were nursing deep wounds, still glaring at each other and Kaoru.

"Come on you guys, let's lighten up! How about a song?"-croaked Misao and immediately shut up after being shot three 'Shut up if you want to live' looks.

"Didn't realize we were still on that"-she murmured and hopped a good deal away.

"What did you mean by throwing my precious cooking away? I made it with so much hard work and love for you ungrateful, horrible, _beasts_ who don't even have the decency to…to…"-words failed Kaoru as she bit back a sob.

"O lord, _please_ don't tell me you're gonna cry…."-moaned Yahiko as Kaoru started crying with wrenching sobs. "Oh damn, now she'll never _stop_!"

Somewhere deep in his pool of loneliness, Kenshin Himura had found an anchor. An anchor, in the shape of the delightful adventures of a girl and her funny companions who were coming to save him. She was crying now, why? He could see them only occasionally in his dreams, and now he couldn't understand what was happening, but sight of her sobbing so pitifully, it just melted his heart. He wanted to see her just once, just to console her, he wanted it SO MUCH!

Blinking through her film of tears, Kaoru saw something strange. Instead of the sunny surroundings, it was suddenly really foggy. Am I _dead_? Suddenly, the fog cleared a little and there was a _very, very, very_ gorgeous guy in princely clothes and long red hair in front of her. He looked hazy, like an apparation. Infact, considering the situation, if he had wings and a halo, it would have just fit in right. "Don't be afraid…"-he said. "I'm not here to hurt you…" (Like duh, who would think he'll hurt _anyone_). The sympathy and loneliness in those lavender orbs was evident. Could _this_ be Prince Kenshin? He was said to have red hair….

He stepped towards her and bent down, and through it all she could hear Sano and Yahiko say something but for some reason she couldn't see them. It was so murky around, she thought, Where were they?

She stopped wondering when the red head stroked her cheek and murmured "It's ok, why are you crying? Everything will be fine…" She stared and tears came anew into her eyes. No one had been this nice, no one had ever touched her with so much love, and no one had ever said something so sweet. She reached forward and wrapped her arms around the guy, it felt _so_ nice. Thank you-she murmured, and felt a happy, almost euphoric feeling envelope her. Until……

She squealed out in pain as sharp claws scratched her face. Opening her eyes, she saw Yahiko's angry and scared face. The connection, or whatever was broken; and it was the same sunny meadow again. She stared at Yahiko in confusion, and looked around. Nope. No Prince Kenshin. "Looks like she's ok now"-said Sano, Kaoru blinked at him-"You ok, little missy?"

"We were so worried; you began acting so strange, looking at something far away, and then you _hugged_Yahiko and said something that sounded like 'Thank you'. Now _that_ was seriously weird…."

"WHAT?"-spat Kaoru and sure enough, in her arms was Yahiko. "EEEEEEEW"- went Kaoru and started trying to chop her hands off. "Yeah, and if I hadn't scratched you god knows what you would've done…."-Yahiko trailed off. Kaoru stopped trying to de-arm herself. They both shuddered. Yuck….

An hour later, everyone had calmed down; they were back on the road. To break the bone-chilling silence, Misao suggested the song again. No one said anything, so she started singing herself. And pretty soon the others joined in. (Mainly to drown out her voice) and the song was a familiar one, too.

"We're off to save Prince Kenshin; the wonderful Prince Kenshin; because, because, because…….." Everyone shut up. "Say, why are we saving him anyway?"-queried Sano. Misao shook her head. Everyone looked confused. "Why are we doing something when we have _absolutely_ no idea why we're doing it?"-he questioned. "Because he's so impossibly hot, that's why"-answered Kaoru. The other three raised their eyebrows, and she felt herself redden. She explained, blushing. "Oh, so that's why you were so weird. And I thought you actually were beginning to _like_ Yahiko. I mean he was trying _so_ hard to make you stop crying, he really cares about you-" Misao was interrupted by a murderous look from Yahiko-in-boots. "SHUT UP"-warned Yahiko through clenched teeth and his eyes glinted dangerously. Nothing more was said about the matter. (No one obviously wanted to get their hearts ripped out)

They walked on and on. "How far is this All-knowing-seer, anyway?"-puffed Kaoru wearily glancing at Sano. "How do I know? Who has the map?"-answered Sano looking at the others. "Don't look at me, no pockets"-stated Misao. "Well I don't have it"-muttered Sano. "Neither do I"-said Kaoru. All of them looked at Yahiko who was chasing something in the grass, completely oblivious to their conversation so far. He looked up at the sudden silence, and everyone was looking at him. "What?"-he stammered. Somehow he felt wary at the way everyone looked at him. "Where is it, Yahiko?"-said Kaoru with the air of a commanding officer.

"Where's what?"

"The map, of course"

"Map, what map?"

"YOU MORON, DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT YOU ACTUALLY **LOST **IT?"-thundered Kaoru. The others glared at him murderously.

"Now, wait just a second-" Yahiko's words were cut short by a-"GET HIM!"

And the next thing he knew, he was being chased all over the place by a killer frog, a banshee, and a giant.

"Wait, you don't understand…."-he stated as he narrowly dodged Sano's huge arms.

"The stupid fool, we're lost now, and it's all his BLOODY FAULT"-screeched Misao.

"Will you guys listen? We don't-"

"Gotcha!"- Cheered Kaoru. Everyone came over. "So, what do we do with him now, drown him or decapitate him or burn him at the stake or……?"

"Oh, anything will do"- grinned Misao, with a look of pure evil.

"Ok, then I'll guess we'll decapitate him"-decided Kaoru. "And eat him for dinner?"-asked Sano. "Sure that's a good idea. What do you think, Kaoru?"- Misao said, though Kaoru didn't look too enthusiastic. And in her moment of indecision-

"THAT'S IT! FOR THE LAST TIME WE DO NOT, I REPEAT, WE DO NOT HAVE A MAP; YOU ABYSMAL FOOL OF A BUSU!"-screamed Yahiko wrenching himself free.

"He's lying"-declared Sano and Misao in unision.

"Yeah, you liar, we did have one and you…..well you… you lost it, didn't you? No… oh my, you're right, we were always lost…….um…… I'm sorry, Yahiko, it just slipped my mind…."-muttered Kaoru.

"DAMN RIGHT, YOU SHOULD BE! AND YOU-"he turned to Misao, "NO ABYSMAL FOOL OF A PRINCE WOULD WANT TO KISS SOMEONE LIKE YOU"-he looked at Sano now, "I KNOW WHY SANO ISN'T YOUR NAME! OH YES I DO! THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S THE NAME OF A SPECIES WITHAN I.QOF ZILCH AND THE APPEARANCE OF A GIANT WITH CAT-KILLING, DISGUSTING TASTES!YOU-" He went on ranting until it was quite dark and was quite exhausted when he was through, and the others too, by the look of their faces, (and their ruptured eardrums). After a _long_, (Trust me, a _very_ long) time, when Yahiko was pacified and promised that he'd never, ever be decapitated or eaten, things quieted down. Nothing was said about dinner, (That would upset you-know-who) and everyone just fell asleep. Well, all except Kaoru. Now that everything was fine, that Prince, he was so _handsome_! And so _incredibly sweet_! But why could only she see him? Oh well, now atleast her dream-prince had a face. Kaoru smiled to herself as she drifted off to sleep, feeling tomorrow and the All-knowing-seer couldn't come soon enough.

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Aurora Whisperwind: Whoa! That was long! So, what do you guys think? Read and review, plz!

To sueb262: You're incredible! Thank you so much for your tips. Am I better now?

To lolo popoki: Thank you so much for being there from the start! I really appreciate it!

To rockyrml: Thank you for reviewing again!


	5. Problems revealed

Aurora Whisperwind: Hi again people! Your reviews made my day! I'm so happy I could **fly! **(Jumps off cliff in the attempt, dies and after a brief resurrection) Ok, so I can't fly.

Disclaimer: I'm in a good mood so; I don't own Rurouni Kenshin or the other fairy tale characters, ok!

Yahiko-in-boots: "..."

Aurora Whisperwind: What? What's wrong?

Yahiko-in-boots: "…"

Aurora Whisperwind: Oh, come on, you're not angry are you, she just hugged you, she didn't try to _kill_ you or anything…. (Sees murderous expression) Ok, so maybe she did, but it was an accident. So stop sulking…. (No reaction) Stop sulking or I'll make worse things happen! I control your life here! I'm the ruler of this story! And there's nothing you can do about it! Muhuhahahaha!

Yahiko-in-boots: "Alright, alright, I'll stop ok! Don't do anything stupider, please!

Aurora Whisperwind: I guess I forgive you then. Nothing bad will happen in _this_ chapter to _you. _On with the fic!

Yahiko-in-boots: Hey, what do you mean by _this_ chapter; huh? What'll happen in the next? Hey answer me!

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"We're here! It's on top of _that_ mountain that the All-knowing-seer lives!"-announced Sano in a tone that conveyed that he thought he should be immediately crowned the supreme ruler of the universe. (Back off Sano, that's me! sees people looking on incredulously Ahem, I'm sorry for interrupting, but I was asserting my position) His companions, however, were unimpressed. "It looks like _any_ other mountain. How do you know _it's_ the one?"-taunted Yahiko-in-boots with a smirk on his face. "You'll see wise guy, there's an easy way to identify it, just wait and see"-retorted Sano.

The _easy_ way, turned out to be pretty shocking. For there was a mile long queue from the foot to the top of the mountain. "Hey Sano, what's this queue for? You never mentioned it!"-growled Misao. "Well, the All-knowing-seer is bound to be popular, right? I mean, he knows everything! But you're right; it was never said to be _this_ crowded before"-he mused. "Hey Yahiko"-whispered Kaoru "Is it just me or is everyone in this crowd a girl with a sake jar?" "It's not just you Busu,"-Yahiko replied, looking around. "I kinda feel outta place, you know"

After what seemed like an eternity, an eternity spent in sun and rain, an eternity spent trying to stop Yahiko from showing his resentment, an eternity spent wondering whether a jar of sake was absolutely necessary, an eternity spent cursing Sano, it was their turn next. Kaoru stepped forward and entered the hut. The others followed her. Inside was a tall, broad shouldered man wearing a red and white thing that looked like a trench coat. (He looks nice, but not exactly prince material, thought Misao) The All-knowing-seer looked at Kaoru with a bored expression on his face.

"Where's the sake, girl?"-he asked barely stifling a yawn. "I…um…I…don't have any sake"-Kaoru replied fervently wishing she had some. "Really,"-he drawled, "You'll just have to go back in line again, this time _with_ the sake, alright?"

"WHAT? IS THAT SOME KIND OF PAYMENT?"-screamed Yahiko. "A talking cat, hey that's interesting"-he said, unflinching.

"But the standard book of fairy tale rules, section 5, clause 3, clearly states that All-knowing-seers are supposed to be cloaked, mysterious and they help for FREE!"-argued Yahiko. The All-knowing-seer looked at him in some surprise. "There's a rule like that? I don't remember. Alright, I'll make an exception in your case _only_ because I'm impressed with this cat of yours, so **don't** you spread this around young lady"- he warned looking at Kaoru. "You, leprechaun, go outside and tell those girls that they have to wait a while, alright?" Sano went outside. All hell broke loose. The All-knowing-seer looked pissed for a while; then gracefully stepped outside. He was back within seconds dragging an unconscious Sano. He looked like someone had hit him on the head with a sake jar atleast twelve times and was drenched in sake. "So, what did you want to know again?"

"I'll go first"-stated Misao. (No one objected, Sano had come to and was nursing his wounds and Kaoru was too busy trying to cure Yahiko's swollen head) "Um…Mr. All-knowing-seer sir…"-she stammered. "Oh, enough of the All-knowing-seer crap, call me Hiko soujiro". "Ok, Mr.Soujiro, I really want to know where my prince is."

"Hmmm….I suppose you'll find him soon…My All-seeing-eye has penetrated into the very heart and soul of this land and I see your prince…he's waiting for you"-he said with a funny smile on his face. He was used to questions like this, _every _girl had the same question, and many thought he was the one. Of course he was, _which_ prince had his looks _or _his charisma? ("Enough of that, Hiko…you're not the prince"-hisses the voice of the author and even_ he_ has to obey, Muhuhahahaha) Ok, so back to the point, this was only a frog, but obviously that ruse had worked, judging by that happy face, exuberant hopping and the 'my prince, my prince…' chanting. He smiled his smug smile.

"My turn"-said Sano, although no one was interested in him, Misao was too happy to listen and Kaoru was still trying to 'De-swell' Yahiko's head. (Knowing Yahiko it's gonna take a long, long time) "Mr.Hiko, I want to know my real name, please, please tell me you know it"-begged Sano with an earnest look on his face. Hiko looked at him for a long time. "I don't know"-He said casting an irritated glance at Sano.

Deathly silence prevailed for a second or two. Then the storm burst. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY 'I DON'T KNOW'? YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO KNOW!"-screamed Sano. "Listen young man, I may know everything, but even one such as I cannot know the names of all the morons in the world, alright? Next!"-Hiko explained as Sano sank to the floor and was lost in bottomless misery.

Kaoru cast a sympathetic glance at him and proceeded. "I want to know how to get to the dark forest."-she declared. Even Hiko looked a little surprised. "The dark forest, huh? Why do _you_ want to get there? That place is dangerous, it's not for little girls like you."-he drawled, getting his composure back. "I'm going there to rescue Prince Kenshin! And I'm not a little girl, thank you"-she said glaring a little at him. Hiko laughed. "Rescue him, _you_? That's the stupidest thing I've heard all day! But then again… Tell me why you want to rescue him, will you?"

Kaoru blushed. Why did _everyone_ want to know this? She explained. Hiko laughed his head off again and abruptly stopped when Kaoru was on the point of letting a rabid dog loose on him. "Let's see… Ok, I'll draw you a map"-he agreed and began to look for a paper. While Kaoru was waiting, the same thing happened again. It became all cloudy and suddenly, without warning, there he was, in all his glory. Prince Kenshin had come again.

"My lady, I'm so grateful to you for all this effort…"-he said smiling. Kaoru mumbled something unintelligible as she was too busy drinking in his features. (To be truthful, I think she was amazing not to faint) "I came to warn you my lady, there are numerous dangers ahead." "Huh? Dangers?"-Kaoru muttered. It didn't make sense. How could there be any when this absolutely stunning man was in front of her? Oh my god, those eyes, that hair… (Sigh)

"Yes and indeed you must be careful; the dark forest is filled with peril, the xnihps for one-"

"The what?"

"The xnihps, it is a dangerous creature, you must ask it a riddle and if it answers right, then you die. Be careful my lady. Many have lost their lives trying to fool it and _your_ life is too precious……Oh and another thing, there is a dr-"

But the connection broke again. _Damn it._ What the heck was he trying to say? "Hey Busu, you ok? Did you see another vision or something?"-Yahiko asked looking a little concerned. Hiko looked on, extremely curious. "A vision? What did you see? You saw that price Kenky guy? What did he say?"-everyone echoed. "Um…let me see…He told me to watch out for something called xnihps, apparently you're supposed to ask him a riddle, and he also told me to watch out for…well…he couldn't finish what he was saying…he could only say dr-" Kaoru explained.

"Dr-?" asked Yahiko.

"Maybe he meant dream prince"-Misao crooned, with a dreamy look in her eyes. "Don't worry Kaoru; I'll get rid of him for you"

"Don't be stupid, maybe he meant drumstick; Mmmmmm….I'd love a nice fat chicken drumstick"-Sano said, finally getting into the spirit of things.

Kaoru and Yahiko looked at each other. "That can't be….maybe it's…."-they said in unison.

"A drag queen"

"A drain"

"A drama"

"A drawing pin"

And so on and so forth. When they had effectively exhausted all the words with starting with 'dr'; Hiko who had been watching with increasing impatience finally burst in. "You lot are thick, aren't you? I mean, _hello!_ We're in a fairy world! It's obviously a DRAGON!"

"Oh!"-they nodded, understanding. "Thank god! Now go away, your times up!"

"Ok, thank you Mr. All-knowing-seer! I mean, Mr. Hiko Soujiro! Bye!"-and they all left. (Deftly avoiding the mad mob outside) "So, what should we do now, how are we supposed to defeat the dragon? And this weird xnihps?"-asked Misao. "Leave the xnihps to me, I can ask it my name. If the All-knowing-seer can't answer, then no one can!"-Smirked Sano. "Good thinking Sano! Now we just have the dragon to take care of!"-cheered Yahiko. Sano looked visibly happier.

"Don't worry, we'll think of something…now lets get some rest"-assured Kaoru. Everyone agreed. Finally, things were going right.

However, they did not notice the pair of golden eyes which watched them out of the woods. Neither did they notice his smirk. "So, they're going to save that Prince Kenshin, huh? I'll have to watch them closer now…….."-decided Saitoh Bloodlust, Heir of the Bloodlust wolf pack.

* * *

So, how was it? I just got this Saitoh idea out of the blue! It's not that funny though…. :( I seem to have some kind jinx. The odd numbered chaps suck! Anyways, what do you guys think of this chap? Read and review please! Thanks to all who've reviewed. It cheered me up like hell :D! Go reviewers! The bestest people in the world!

To lolo popoki: You're the sweetest person in the world! Seriously! Thank you for reviewing from the start! I'm looking forward to your response for this chapter!

To sueb262: Thank you for the comments! Blushes what do you think of this one?

To Rurouni-maxi: You're review was sooooo cute! And yes, I did think of Aoshi at first, but I thought Hiko was a better choice. Don't worry though coz Aoshi is in this story for sure!

To Khrysalis: Thank you for reviewing again! I'm glad you like Kenshin!

To everyone else, thank you! Plz keep reviewing!


	6. The wolf enters

Aurora Whisperwind: Hello! I finished my exams! That's the only thing I'm happy about as I pretty much sucked……. sigh So anyway, I've nothing better to do right now so I thought, why not finish chap 6? And please, I need help; please check my bio-page.

Disclaimer: I'm depressed, so I don't own Rurouni Kenshin and I never will either, happy? And I'm warning you, this chap is not that funny. Somehow I'm not able to bring any cheer into it. Jeez, this chap seems so forced……..

* * *

"Hmm….I'd better follow them; though they look like absolutely colossal idiots. I mean, the 'Little _red_ riding hood' they're going to rescue is my victim…."-mused Saitoh. "Well, I think you should join them"- A gentle voice declared from the top of Saitoh's head. "You again?"- Saitoh grumbled, looking up at the cute little wolf floating above him. "I told you before, I don't need you!"

"Ah, but you do. I'm after all-"

"Yes, yes, I know. You're my 'fairy wolf brother'. That's such a _stupid_ title you know? Well, I'm still calling you Okita. Now, why do you think _I_ should join them?"

"Why do _you_ want to follow them?"-Okita retorted; a cheeky grin on his face.

"I want to follow them because they have a map, you idiot. Do you know how easy it is to get lost in the dark forest? Especially with you around."-he snarled at Okita. "Well I think you should join them because they can help you defeat the dragon"-replied Okita with a sincere expression on his face. It was wasted. "Do you honestly think that I, The heir of the Bloodlust clan, Saitoh Bloodlust, can't take care of a _mere_ dragon? As I told you before, I don't need you. _Go away_!"-he said through clenched teeth shooting Okita a glare. (A fearsome sight indeed but Okita is a fairy here) Okita stuck out his tongue. "Fine then, be all high and mighty. I won't advice you, not even when you need it!"-he pouted with a childish look on his face. "Oh, are you going to shut up then? Finally, some peace and quiet"-Saitoh turned around and continued to watch our friends.

"We're going to the dark forest!"-Everyone chanted.

"I'll find and rescue Prince Kenshin!"-Kaoru cheered.

"I'll find my prince _and_ kiss him _and_ turn human!"-Misao screeched.

Yahiko-in-boots and Sano looked at each other. "We really don't have any particular reasons, do we?" "I suppose" "Okay then, we're doing this so that our names and our adventures will become legendary! We'll be world famous! Immortalized! There won't be a single person who doesn't know our name! We-"

"Shut up, will you!"-shouted Yahiko interrupting Sano's merry speech. "Busu, take that map out; we need to know which way we have to go". "Finally"-thought our wolf in the woods.

Kaoru obediently took the map out and simultaneously hit Yahiko on the head with a bokken. "Hmmmm…..this is map is complicated. I don't understand it. What do you think, Sano?"-queried Kaoru with a confused look on her face. "Are you crazy? You're asking him of all the people? We'll end up in a desert or in the middle of the ocean or at the North Pole! He's the dumbest guy in the universe! He doesn't know his own name!"-Yahiko rolled his eyes.

"TAKE…THAT…BACK"-warned Sano.

"No way!"

"Okay then, you asked for it"-Sano leaped on top of Yahiko and knocked Kaoru down in the process. Soon a furious fight had started. (Misao joined in any fight that came across her path)

"Oh no! These idiots will rip that map to pieces."-Saitoh looked alarmed. "Oooh, looks like 'Mr. I'm too cool to listen to Okita' will have to join them after all! Serves you right! Now go and stop them before they tear it!"-Saitoh saw the wisdom in this remark (Though not the manner in which it was conveyed) and actually obeyed. He stepped out of the shadows. The fight continued. 'Such idiots……. **Why** am I doing this?' He cleared his throat or what he thought was clearing his throat. What came out instead was a low growl.

Everyone froze at that. They looked up to the sight of a fierce looking wolf with strange golden eyes. Saitoh thought fast. "I heard your little…um…predicament. Can I take a look at that map of yours? I'm going to the dark forest myself and I might be able to... ah..._ help_". He could hear Okita almost choke in barely concealed laughter. 'I'll deal with you later' He whispered. Okita put on a 'What did I do?' expression. Saitoh turned his attention back to the bunch of morons who were still staring at him. The tall leprechaun was the first to react. "You're a wolf."

'Oh my god, thank you _so_ much for the info….Until this blessed moment, I never knew that I was a wolf, what a fool I was…….'-a hundred other sarcastic comments passed through Saitoh's head. "But wolves are dangerous! He probably came to eat us!"-screamed Sano. The wolf looked at him disdainfully. "I don't eat junk."

Everyone looked confused at that comment. Saitoh fought hard not to blow up. "So can I see that map?"-he muttered through forced calm. When no one replied, he snatched it from the girl's hand. "This is easy… according to this we have to travel west"-Saitoh declared, throwing the map at Kaoru's face and walking off. "Wow! You're amazing! Who are you?"-asked Yahiko in wonder as they all followed him. Saitoh said nothing.

A few hours later……

The silence was chilling. The wolf didn't seem too talkative and seemed lost in thoughts. Okita's irritating voice came to him again. "So, are you just going to leave them to the dragon?"

"I thought I told you to leave me alone"

"But-"

"SHUT UP, WILL YOU! YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY!"

"Okay, but they heard you"

Our company was indeed very, very, surprised to see their till now dignified and scary wolf start shouting madly at thin air, still scary. "Uh…Mr. scary wolf man, are you a little insane? Who're you talking to?"

Saitoh drew himself up proudly. "I was merely contemplating on which direction we ought to go now. That's all. And my name is Saitoh Bloodlust."

"Ohhhhhhh"

"So, why are all of you going into the dark forest?"

"We're off to save Prince Kenshin"

"_Really_….so, how do you plan to beat the dragon?"

"We haven't thought of that yet, but we will soon. I heard that a dragon's weak point is its belly, so maybe we can stab it. My famed sword will do it!"-declared Sano brandishing a rusted sword in his hand.

"Are you brain dead?"-taunted Saitoh. "Do you think the dragon is stupid? She has a titanium sheath for her belly. Your…uh, you call that a sword? That toothpick will never go anywhere." Sano looked downcast.

"Well, how about its eyes?"-inquired Misao. "I heard that another weak point of a dragon is its eyes"

"True. It's the only chance we have. Megumi is smart though. It won't be easy"

"Megumi?"

"It's the dragon's name"

"It's a girl dragon?"

"Obviously"

"Oooooooh, no wonder you know!"-Sano jeered and was immediately pinned to a tree by an iron paw. Saitoh started choking him. "What did you say?"

"Nothing, nothing at all, what would I say?"

"Good"-Saitoh dropped him.

"Jeez, what the heck's wrong with this wolf? Can't he take a joke?"-whispered Sano to Misao who nodded fearfully.

"I heard that"-Saitoh said, not turning around.

Four heads sank into the grass.

"Sooooooooo, you're having an affair with the dragon. You should've told me…… I had no idea…"

"Shut up, Okita"

"Ok"

Night had fallen long ago but the wolf hadn't stopped. No one even dared to ask him if they could take a break. Our four friends picked chits to see who would ask him. Kaoru was the unlucky one. "Farewell Kaoru. It was nice knowing you"-Sano and Misao said their goodbyes. "Why does she have to die? Her whole life was in front of her!"-sobbed Misao.

"Why don't you cook something for him? If he's sane, he'll listen to anything you say after he eats it"-suggested Yahiko-in-boots.

"WHAT?"

"He means that your food is so good that it'll melt his heart"-said Misao clamping her hand over Yahiko's mouth. "Right Sano?"-Sano nodded earnestly.

"I suppose you guys are right….. But lets just ask him first"

"Yeah, let the poor wolf atleast have a say before he dies…"-muttered Sano.

Kaoru stepped forward. "Um….Saitoh, I'm sorry, but can we have some rest? It's already quite late"

"What? Why?"-snarled Saitoh.

"He's dead"-chorused Sano, Misao and Yahiko.

"Because it's late and we're tired you know……."

"Stupid weaknesses…. Do you know, girl, that we will _never_ get there if we keep taking these _breaks_?"

Kaoru put on a miserable expression-"I know…. but we're hungry…and-"

"Oh _please_ don't start whining…. Alright, we'll take a break for fifteen minutes"

"FIFTEEN MINUTES? BUT THEN, WHAT ABOUT-"

Saitoh gave her a piercing look which shut her up. Kaoru looked flustered.

"Well then I'll have to use my secret weapon! I'll cook for you"-Kaoru resolved.

She commanded everyone to help her and they reluctantly obeyed. The wolf wasn't that bad…… Yahiko got the firewood and Sano provided a rabbit which he had caught. Saitoh watched the proceedings with a passive interest. 'Odd…. Why do the others look so worried?'-he said almost to himself. Okita heard-"Maybe they're afraid of you"

"That's news to me. Will you ever-" but he stopped mid sentence. The frog, cat and leprechaun had disappeared into the woods and were watching him with looks of apprehension. He was just about to get up and ask when he was distracted by a-"Dinners ready!" by Kaoru.

"He is sooooooooo dead"-the three chorused wearing gas masks. "Hey, where's everyone else?"-Kaoru asked, putting Saitoh's share on a clean leaf and looking around. Saitoh didn't reply. He was too busy looking at his share. He fingered them and nervously took a bite. "Sano, we have to warn him! No one should suffer such an awful fate!"-Yahiko screamed tugging at Sano's clothes. They rushed out, but…..

Too late. Saitoh choked and swooned. A delighted Kaoru bounded to her friends. "See, a bite of my divine cooking and he fainted" "Yeah"-said Yahiko looking at the poor wolf with sympathy.

"Want to eat?"-Kaoru asked glee still on her face. All three of them refused at once. "No Kaoru…. We're not hungry…. We'll just wash up and go to sleep…." Fortunately there were plenty of fruit trees a little far off.

They had just dropped off to sleep when Yahiko started coughing and wheezing. "What's wrong? What's with you, Yahiko?"-Kaoru asked in some panic. He was trying to say something but couldn't. He coughed again, heaving. "HE'S CHOKING!"-screamed Sano and Kaoru who started running around like maniacs. The noise woke Saitoh who watched the scene quietly for a while. It looked like he had to take matters into his own hands now. Sigh. He had noticed that someone was missing and so had guessed what was wrong with Yahiko-in-boots.

"CALM DOWN ALL OF YOU!"-everyone stopped and Sano and Kaoru crashed into each other.

"Now cat, open your mouth"-Yahiko obediently opened his mouth. "Come out of there, frog woman"-Misao hopped out. "Problem solved"

"WHAT WERE YOU DOING IN YAHIKO'S MOUTH, MISAO?"-Kaoru demanded getting up. "I…I…um…I…must have sleepwalked"-Misao sheepishly admitted. (AN: Thank you, animefreakgal456!)

Yahiko was still in shock. "You saved my life!"-he declared and hugged a startled Saitoh.

He was joined by everyone else until Saitoh could hardly breathe. "Get… off… me"

No one cared. Saitoh let out a growl which sounded more like a whimper. Okita was laughing again. Oh, he will pay……. Saitoh growled again, loudly this time.

"Aaaw you poor wolf… ok we'll let you sleep"-Kaoru crooned.

Saitoh stared at her in disbelief. Okita was laughing madly above him. 'WHAT A SICK DAY!'

They had barely fallen asleep again when Kaoru screamed……..

* * *

Why did Kaoru scream? You'll find out in the next chap! Hint: It's Kenshin. Guess!

**Author's notes:** Okay, firstly I'd like to thank **animefreakgal456** for the Yahiko choking part. I'm sorry though, I didn't put it that well….. Please don't hesitate to tell me what you want to read, really! I won't take credit for them, I promise!

And I'm leaving this at a cliffie until I get lots of reviews! MUHUHAHAHAHAHAHA!

BTW, **sueb262**, where are you? Someone find her! I'm dying!

**To lolo popoki:** What can I say about you? You're the best! Plz keep reviewing! I'll die of a heart attack if you don't review!

**To Rurouni-maxi:** Your reviews are seriously funny! And as for Yahiko's head, "Alright, I'll make an exception in your case _only_ because I'm impressed with this cat of yours, so **don't** you spread this around young lady"-This line should help!

Keep reviewing please! It really makes me happy! And please check my bio-page!


	7. The xnihps

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Hello again! Thanks people for responding to that lame chappie! Anyways I'm happier now that I got reviews! Yay! So here's the seventh chap! And I'm sorry, but the cliffie is lame…. Ha ha

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin, okay? But I own Yahiko! He's mine to torture! MUHUHAHAHAHAHA!

**Yahiko-in-boots:** What was that?

**Aurora Whisperwind:** You have a problem with that, punk?

Yahiko takes one look at her evil face and waiting keyboard and shrugs. 'Nothing, really….'

* * *

'I never get even a moment of peace… do these people just like to scream?'-Saitoh muttered as he tried to ignore Kaoru's scream and the subsequent panicked yelps of her dumb companions. Opening his eyes a sliver he found out that the girl seemed to be in some kind of a trance. Interesting… _'No!'_ –he shook himself hard. This rubbish had to be stopped and most probably it would have to be him again…. 

What had happened was…..

Kaoru had felt Prince Kenshin coming and waited eagerly for him to appear. But the first thing he had said was-"Kaoru-dono-" He never got any further. 'WHAT? WHAT DID HE CALL ME?'-her head felt like it would burst… she screamed and lunged forward to wring his neck. Prince Kenshin looked panicked as he dodged her hands-"What? My lady, what's wrong? I just said…" he choked as Kaoru seized him. "I mean, I came to say that the wolf you're traveling with…. cough cough he's not ordinary… cough " he swooned. Kaoru had realized he was trying to tell her something important but he had swooned by then. 'OMG! WHAT THE HECK DID I DO? IS HE DEAD?' But before she could confirm anything, the mist cleared and she found herself looking at her panicked friends (though Yahiko looked fiendishly amused) and the wolf's creepy amber eyes.

There was helping to it. "I killed him! I killed Price Kenshin!"-she wailed. "He was trying to tell me something important but I killed him!" Everyone gasped, aghast. Misao looked angry-"Why did you do that, Kaoru? Now it'll be harder for me to find someone!" Both of them started crying their heads off, while Yahiko giggled like he was possessed. Sano just watched.

'What a sentimental scene…'-Okita crooned sleepily. Saitoh sighed. These people were dumb. His 'fairy wolf-brother' was dumb. The crying was getting on his nerves "Listen girl, do you know that you cannot kill apparitions? You can hurt them, but you can't kill" Kaoru lifted her big blue watery eyes to him. "Is that true? Sniff " Saitoh rolled his eyes. "Yes it's true, isn't it?"-he looked meaningfully at Sano and Yahiko who nodded nervously. "He didn't die then! Yay! Oooooooh, he did say you weren't ordinary! No you're not! You are amazing! Thank you!"-she blabbered as she tried to hug him again. Saitoh gulped and leaped out of the way. He had no intention of becoming a cuddly dog _again_ and Kaoru hit the floor hard with her jaw.

"Well, we've had enough rest, right? We'll leave now"-Saitoh commanded as he prepared to leave. 'He knows' muttered Okita. 'I know, but these fools will never figure it out, don't worry. This Prince is smart, but not smart enough'-replied Saitoh with an evil grin. "What about the night of the full moon?"-asked Okita, still sounding unconvinced. "Two days left for that, don't worry your pretty little head over that"-Saitoh assured.

The dark forest was, well, dark. The trees were dead and twisted, looking for people to trip. Sano held the record with 36 falls and 3 hysterical fits. Yahiko was not far behind with 29 falls and 2 hysterical fits. They had walked for a quite a long while when Saitoh, who was leading the way, stopped suddenly and whispered "She's here" And out of the dark mist before them, stepped a woman with a lion's head. She was graceful, elegantly dressed and inscrutably beautiful.

She smiled at them and said-"Greetings my young travelers. I am the xnihps. You know what to do"

Saitoh regarded her for a moment and opened his mouth, but was cut short by Sano- "Oooh, I've been waiting for this…"

"Stay out of this, Sano"-Saitoh warned but Sano ignored him.

"Alright weird cat-lion-woman thingy, here's something you can't answer. What's my name?"

The xnihps stared at him and then very slowly asked him if Sano wasn't his name. Sano explained that his true name was unknown. (Blah blah blah you know the story) The xnihps remained thoughtful for a while and then said with an triumphant smile "That's easy, a man who keeps asking his name… you're Sanostiltskin!" Sano's jaw dropped. "You're right! Hey guys that's my name!" Everyone got together into a group hug and cheered (obviously excepting Saitoh)

"Yes, I remember now, you're right, but how did you-" The xnihps smiled "I know my fairy tales. Now if you don't mind, you're all dead"

They stopped cheering. Everyone obviously forgot about that part of the agreement. "RUN!" yelled Yahiko-in-boots and there was a mad scramble which was quickly cut short by the xnihps. "Okay, who should I eat first, ah the wolf! I salute your bravery, handsome wolf. You were the only one who did not attempt to run. It will be an honor to eat you" Saitoh did not flinch. Instead he stood watching her with a strange smile "Save your saliva, xnihps, as I have a discrepancy to point out"

The xnihps blinked "A discrepancy? Well, go ahead" Saitoh bowed "if you remember, we are supposed to ask you riddle. What this idiot asked you was a question, not a riddle" She looked flabbergasted "Very well then, ask me the riddle" Saitoh nodded "Gladly, my lady. Well then tell me-"

'Tell me the name of a creature winged  
Fierce, with a thousand limbs and clawed  
All knowing and strong, million eyed  
But with a mind and resolve flawed'

The xnihps looked seriously shocked. Saitoh smirked. He knew he had won. She pondered for a while and then bowed gracefully and backed away. "You've won, and for that, I let you and your companions go. But I wish to know, what is the creature you speak of?" Saitoh smirked some more and said "Nothing. Every question needn't have an answer, you know"

The xnihps threw back her head and laughed. "Right you are, I forgot about that. To thank you my fierce and noble wolf, I give you a warning. Your path is filled with danger great and I am but the beginning. Your next test will be greater. For-

'Beware the man with servants three  
Whose heart is colder than the icy sea  
For though his looks may fill you with glee  
Know that he won't let you walk free'

And with those she disappeared into the shadows again. Kaoru looked alarmed "Who the heck was she talking about?" Saitoh looked thoughtful "I believe she was referring to… but it can't be; he can't exist…" He walked off. "Hey wait! You were amazing, Saitoh, I mean, even the xnihps was impressed!" Yahiko was still ranting about how cool Saitoh was but he was hardly paying any attention at all. 'So, you think it's him, then?' Okita's calm voice came again. "Maybe. If it's true, then we have quite a fight on our hands' Saitoh muttered. By the yelling behind him, the others were obviously devising their own strategy to defeat him.

'But the biggest problem here is the man itself. He's a fanatic. I wonder how the dark wizard managed to recruit his services' Okita wondered aloud. Saitoh looked at him 'Interesting point there, Okita. Not for money, definitely. Maybe for power or-' this train of thought was interrupted rudely by Misao who jumped on top of his head and started bouncing, screaming "I know how to beat him! He's my Prince! I'll melt his stone-cold heart!" Saitoh considered squashing her but decided to just pick her up and throw her away. 'Fools…..' he mumbled as Okita giggled insanely.

Yahiko noticed that Kaoru was unusually quiet. "What's up, Busu? You didn't kill Prince Kenshin, right? So what's your problem?" Kaoru looked at him distractedly. "I suppose, but I was just wondering… this guy she warned us about… what if he kills any of us? What if you're killed? I don't think I can live with myself if I escape" her eyes welled up. "I don't want to see any of you die" Yahiko's reply was dead-pan "Well, if you die first, then you won't" Kaoru lifted her shimmering blue eyes to his and threw her arms around him.

"EEEEEEEW! GET OFF ME! BUSU! GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF ME!" Sano rescued Yahiko from Kaoru's grip and calmed her down. Saitoh smirked and paused. A thought struck him. "You know, there's a surefire way of killing this guy. Just cook for him" Kaoru stopped crying. His blue eyes caught fire and she lunged at Saitoh screaming something unintelligible. Saitoh looked alarmed and shot off. Misao finally regained consciousness after her flight to the tree which earned her a nasty bump on the head. "What happened…?" Grinning, Sano explained while Yahiko gagged nearby. Yep, even with impending danger, life didn't change that much. And neither did Kaoru.

* * *

Ta da! How was it? Not funny, I'm sure but I still like this chap. I love the xnihps! What about you guys? This story is shaping up again! Woo! Were the riddles nice? I was never a poet, so these were the best I could come up with! Review please! 

**To lolo popoki:** You're first on my thank you list! I'm running out of things to say! Thank you really, I'm very grateful that you're there for both my stories! and don't worry, this story won't take years! ; )

**To Rurouni-maxi: **This story brightens your day! I'm flattered, really! that's such a nice thing to say!Keep reviewing and thank you for your help!

**To sueb262: **Thank god you're back! I freaked out when you didn't review my 5th chap! Thank you for the suggestions, I reposted chap 6, did you read it? Oh and will you please, please read my other fics? I really want to know what you think!

**To animefreakgal456:** Hey thanks for reviewing! I love your story too, and I'm going to be a faithful reviewer! Keep reading!

**To LordFluffyLoverOfPain: **Thank you so much for reviewing! I'm glad you like this story!

Review please people! It makes me as happy as hell!


	8. Strage meetings

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Hey people! I just read 'The Hitokiri Stainmaster' by Angrybee! OMG! It had me laughing until I fainted on my keyboard, read it! It just has to be the funniest thing on the entire planet! On a different note, here is my 8th chap!

**Disclaimer:** I do not Rurouni Kenshin or the fairy tales. But I do own Saitoh's wolf form, Okita's fairy form, Yahiko's cat form, Sano's-

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** Shut up and let's get on with the story!

**Aurora Whisperwind: **Creep! How dare you talk back to me, you weird grey wolf with unhealthy habits and golden eyes! I've made you look good in this story!

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** You've made me look good because you had no choice, silly girl! (Smiles snidely revealing his Oh-so-dangerous fangs)

**Aurora Whisperwind: **_Really……._ Well how about I change the story a little and make you a flying purple hippo with a top hat whose special attack is blowing kisses at enemies?

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** Shudders violently and backs away, mumbling something.

**Aurora Whisperwind: **Good wolf… and oh, before I forget, the flying hippo belongs to Microsoft Games.

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** (Bursting out of his spell) what? You mean that thing is in the story?

* * *

'Beware the man with servants three… Hmm, if it is really him, what to do?' Saitoh mumbled, loud enough for Okita to hear. Okita didn't say anything. Saitoh jerked his head up, looking for him. 'Where did he go to?' Come to think of it, Okita hadn't bothered him at all since yesterday. He hadn't said anything insulting at all!

A few minutes later, Saitoh started to panic. 'Okita! Okita! Where the heck are you, you miserable fairy?' he whispered, looking wildly around him. He thought about what he had said the last evening, whether he had upset Okita in some way. 'I didn't say anything! I was too busy running away from that psychopathic nutcase!' _Forget about it_, he said to himself. Just forget about it, he'll come round soon. But he couldn't forget about it at all…

The dark forest was definitely getting stranger. "I feel like someone's watching us all the time"-whispered Kaoru looking nervously about her. "Yeah, I feel the same" agreed Misao. Sano and Yahiko were too busy fighting to agree. Just then, Saitoh stopped, looking very worried. "Hey what's wrong, wolfie?" inquired Sano. Saitoh said nothing and continued to search the tree tops. Finally, he spoke "I have to leave you for a while. You may go on if you wish or you may stay here. Do as you like" he bounded off. "What's with him?" Yahiko asked, scratching his head. "No idea. What do you think we should do? Should we go on?"-asked Misao. "Yes, we will. He can find us if he wants to" And thus decided, they moved on. Little did they know they were walking into the arms of mother Foolishness… and her sister, mother Danger. Ah, poor, poor, people.

Back to Saitoh- he was indeed in a sick mood. Stupid Okita. Maybe the nutter had fallen asleep and had been left behind in their camp. Saitoh sprinted to their camp site, easily distinguished by the recently dug pits to throw Kaoru's food. "Okita! Okita! Where are you? You'll pay for this your irresponsible creep!" Silence greeted his words. Saitoh seriously began to get worried. It was not like Okita to run off like that, not with the full moon so close…. He had not much time to ponder though. From far away came the yells of his companions. What were they yelling about now?

Kaoru, Sano, Yahiko and Misao were indeed in some predicament. For Saitoh had forgotten to give them the map (don't ask me how it was with him, ignore that part) and they only realized it quite late. And for the billionth time in this story, they were lost… Anyway, they realized this when a giant shape passed over them. Yahiko looked above him and was shocked to see a humungous, purple, top-hat wearing, flying Hippo. How it flew none knew, but now every one among them (And so, everyone reading this story) knew how rainbows were created. No, no, it's not because of light and raindrops acting as tiny prisms, no indeed. That was a fairy tale told to adolescents in high schools, to save them from the actual, horrifying reason.

The rainbows are created by the Hippo's. When they fly. From their butts. I'm sorry, you poor misled high school students. You have been deceived. Ah, yes, by the ones who called themselves your elders. But they had their own reasons, for the real reason would terrify those with tender tendons and delicate digestion. But the truth has to be unveiled. How long can we keep ourselves in ignorance?

"Ugh, what is that thing?" asked Yahiko, wrinkling his nose in disgust. The purple hippo looked at them. "Uh oh… why did you say that you moron?" Kaoru clamped her hand over Yahiko's mouth. The hippo straightened and swooped down to attack. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" they yelled and tried to run but the hippo blocked their way. It opened its mouth and-

_Slash_. Saitoh dug his claws into its skin. It yelped and backed away. "You saved us Saitoh! It was gonna eat us…" Sano said, while the others nodded. Saitoh looked at the hippo "Ugh, what is that thing?" the hippo looked at him. Its eyes watered. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH" it started to bawl as Saitoh stared in confusion. He looked at the others; but they offered him no clue. Finally Kaoru ventured– "Uh, okay, don't cry now… we didn't mean that. Um, wha- I mean, who are you?"

The hippo paused and spluttered out "Me Bulba. Bulba lost. Bulba hungry. Please help Bulba find mamma and papa. Bulba missing them…" its lip quivered again. Everyone's head reeled. This thing was a baby? This enormous creature? Sano was touched "Okay Bulba, we'll help you find your parents. So don't cry" The hippo looked gratified. "Yay! Bulba happy!"

They trooped off, leaving a disgruntled Saitoh. A thought struck him "Wait! Where are you idiots going? Do you have any idea of where we have to go?" they looked at him and laughed. "Saitoh, don't worry, we'll find this guy's home" Misao said, looking at him like he was a little cub who was skeptical. They walked all noon hunting for a horde of rainbows. Nothing. Bulba, on the other hand seemed extremely happy now. He chirped something joyfully and bounced around, bouncing everyone else with him. Saitoh walked along mournfully, now really sure that something had happened to Okita. But what could happen to a fairy? Then again, you couldn't tell in the dark forest.

He crashed into Kaoru who had stopped abruptly. "What? What's wrong?" he grumbled as he looked beyond her. There seemed to be something in the woods up ahead. Saitoh pushed past the others. "Who's that? Show yourself!" he snarled. A reedy voice piped up "Chuka, is that you?" A bear stepped out, wearing a Canadian flag as a cape. He was wearing some kind of pelt which a monkey on one side. They stared. "Ugh, what is that thing?" the bear said, pointing at Bulba. "We might ask you the same" chirped Sano, while Bulba's eyes welled up again.

"Watch the tongue, boy" commanded the bear "I'm the owner and king of this forest! I'm the indestructible Canadian bear! I live to fight evil!" Saitoh stepped in "Really! Then why is it dark? If you live to fight evil as you say, then why isn't this forest bright?" the bear looked sheepish "Well…… I was pretty poor, and I really couldn't afford fancy lighting. I thought the natural sunlight would do, but then these stupid trees grew and obstructed everything…." Everyone, including Saitoh sweat dropped a little.

"Okay then, do you know where the herd of flying purple Hippos live? We're taking this one back" Misao asked. The bear looked at her, surprised. "There's a whole herd of them? In my forest? I never knew. I was too busy searching for my other monkey, Chuka. By the way, meet this one, Luka" Everyone sweat dropped again. "Uh, Hi Luka!" chirped Kaoru. "Tell you what" the bear began "I'll join you. We'll find Chuka and this herd" he strode off, before anyone could complain. Misao hopped off behind him, adding to the others "Come on, if he's the owner of this forest, he'll know where everything is! He might be able to help us defeat the dragon and everything else!"

"She has a point you know" said Sano and they all followed her. Saitoh was extremely pissed now. 'No Okita and we're hunting flying purple hippos with a Canadian bear that's lost his monkey. This has to be the stupidest day ever!' he followed as well, making a resolve that he would definitely kill Okita if he was ever found again.

* * *

That's it! The story has turned a little insane now, don't you guys think? Anyways, the Canadian bear also belongs to Microsoft games. Tell me if I made any mistakes. And where's Okita?

**To lolo popoki:** You'll still have to wait for Saitoh's 'secret' as such! What do you think of this chappie? Pleasekeep reviewing! Love you!

**To sueb262:** Thank you for appreciating chap 6! This chap is rather stupid, I know….. Keep reviewing and thank you for your support!

**To Rurouni-maxi:** I'm glad you like Okita! Well here's the update! Review!

**To phantom of blood:** You changed your name! Anyway this one sounds cooler! Keep reviewing!

**To animefreakgal456:** Wow, you took long to review! I like your story a lot, too! Please keep reviewing!

Please review! I'll thank all of you!


	9. The man with servants three

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Hi again, people! I'm really sorry I didn't update this for so long, but I was too lazy to type and I really was busy with my other stories, so…. Anyways here's chapter 9!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any of its characters. I also do not own the flying purple bears or the Canadian bear with the monkeys.

**Saitoh bloodlust:** You've shown me in such bad light! Like I'll ever worry about Okita…

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Look! Okita's here!

**Saitoh bloodlust:** What? Where?

**Aurora Whisperwind:** HAHA! Gotcha! You do care! AAAAAAAAAAWWWWW!

**Saitoh bloodlust:** Grrrrrrrrrrrrr….

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Let's get on with the story!

* * *

Between Bulba's constant happy baby talk, the stupid bear's macho moronic rambling and everyone else's stupidity, Saitoh found himself going insane. They had been wandering all day, but had found nothing. Evening was approaching, and just when Saitoh was beginning to seriously consider killing himself, a horde of rainbows appeared at the horizon. "Hey look Bulba! Your tribe! We found them!" yelled Yahiko-in-boots, earning himself a happy squeal and trampling from the hippo.

"Alright!" yelled Sanostiltskin, "Let's go!" They were a mere three feet away from them when Bulba refused to go any further. Saitoh lost it and practically destroyed half the forest in his rage. "Bulba scared" the hippo declared, cowering "Bulba's tribe angry" Saitoh stopped raving. "Really?" he drawled, back to his old self "Let's go see then" The tribe _was_ in rage. There were over forty of them, at least ten times bigger than Bulba. And they were indeed angry and trampling over….

"Okita!" screamed Saitoh.

"Chuka!" screamed the Canadian bear.

Both of them, a fairy and a monkey were being trampled on by a fierce horde of rainbow discharging hippos. "Quick Bulba! Go say hi to your tribe!" said Kaoru, pushing the baby hippo. "Yeah" echoed Misao, "Or else that monkey and fairy will be mashed flat!" Saitoh froze. _They could see Okita?_ That was seriously weird…. Trembling, the baby stepped forward "Mamma! Papa! Bulba found you!" The hippos stopped what they were doing. "BULBA!" they all cheered in a practically ear splitting wail. They all converged to hug him.

Seeing his chance, Saitoh rushed to Okita. "You idiot!" he snarled "Why the heck are you here? Don't you know that the night of the full moon is today?" To his surprise, Okita's lip trembled and he burst into tears. "O Saitoh-sama!" he sobbed out, throwing his arms around the unwilling wolf "I was so scared! See, I was sleeping when these rainbows flew right above us! They were sooooooo pretty! So I followed them! And then- and then-" he dissolved into more tears. Saitoh growled "Moron! Do you have any idea how much trouble you caused me? I wandered around half the forest looking for you!" If he thought that this would stop Okita's incessant crying, he was wrong. Okita just looked at him in wonder and burst into fresh tears of gratitude "You looked for me! You really care about me! I'M SO SORRY SAITOH-SAMA! I MISSED YOU TOO!" The last few words were yelled out so loud that everyone heard them, I mean everyone. The bear even stopped telling off the monkey to stare.

"Get off me, will you" Saitoh choked out "Everyone's staring" Okita let go, sniffing slowly. Saitoh noticed that his wings seemed to have vanished. Full moon effect. No one said anything for a long time. The bears had gone.

Silence.

More silence.

Even more silence.

Still more silence.

Ok, that's it. I'm fast-forwarding.

Okita finally decided to do something. "Hi everyone" he said, bowing "I'm Okita, Saitoh-sama's fairy wolf-brother and prote-" Saitoh clamped his paw over his mouth, snarling "Shut up! That's all they need to know" Still silence. Kaoru and Misao stared and then squealed together "OH HE'S SOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE!" Okita smiled a bit nervously and backed away. "Uh... I'm leaving now" declared the bear and before they could do anything, vanished. "How could he run that fast?" Yahiko-in-boots exclaimed in wonder.

Twilight came, and just as Saitoh was wondering what to do, the air around them stiffened, literally. "Wait" he whispered hoarsely to the others. Slowly, three spirits stepped out, smiling wildly. "Water, thunder and fire" whispered Okita, awe in his face. "True" said the water spirit, pushing its long flowing hair out of its face. "Welcome". Saitoh watched warily, and muttered "So, we have to fight you three to get to your master". "Yes, but why worry, you'll never reach him. Here ends your journey, poor people. Ready?" asked the fire spirit. "RUN!" yelled Saitoh at the others "RUN AND HIDE! I'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS!" he lunged towards the fire spirit and the thunder spirit. "I'm not going to run" said Okita, leaping into battle with the water spirit.

Sano stood in front of Kaoru, who was holding both Yahiko-in-boots and Misao. They kept fighting, Saitoh and Okita looked a little tired, but the spirits looked fine. Both Saitoh's and Okita's energy had been spent dodging attacks while these three twirled around like they were dancing. Yahiko was fighting, tooth and nail to get into the action. "Let go, Busu! I've an idea!" he scratched her, causing her to drop him. "You guys ready to experience major pain?" he asked, as Sano tried to drag him back. "I knew this would come handy" he declared, a gleeful look on his furry face taking a bag out. "Behold my secret weapon!" he screamed, distracting the spirits, who let go of Saitoh and Okita and instead prepared to attack the cat. They lunged at him, but…

In a blinding move, they screamed in agony as Yahiko threw something at them from the bag. They writhed in pain and screaming, disintegrated. The wolves watched, dumbstruck. What the heck did this little cat throw at such powerful creatures? Yahiko grinned at Saitoh. "You gave me the idea, Saitoh" he chimed "Busu's cooking!" he opened the bag to reveal several grey black lumps. "It'll kill anyone" he declared, smirking. Saitoh simply stared. Okita giggled as Kaoru proceeded to mash Yahiko flat, not listening to his 'but I saved you lives' crap.

"So, you think you've won, eh?" a cold voice announced. A man stepped out looking extremely menacing, and the air stiffened again. He had dark hair, and piercing green eyes. "Funny that my servants were defeated by a mere cat. Not this time, though" he said, calmly drawing two short blades. "Hey buster!" screamed Yahiko, "They were killed you moron! And I was the one who did it!" the man stared at him, contempt on his face. "They are not killed. They will reincarnate. But thanks to an enchantment, they cannot attack you again, but you will die here in my hands anyway. Such cheap, childish tricks do not work on me"

"Aoshi Shinomori" drawled Saitoh, a smile on his face. "Ah… Saitoh bloodlust and as I see, Okita" said Aoshi, tearing his eyes away from an extremely murderous looking Yahiko, and bowing. "Right, so as the rays of the full moon shall affect you both in a short while, this will be very interesting indeed" Saitoh and Okita grinned for the first time that evening. They stepped into the clearing so that the moon's rays could touch them while the rest watched, fascinated. Nothing happened for a minute or two, but then things happened fast. An unseen wind came, swirling around them while a beam of light illuminated the clearing like bright day. "You see, we may become extremely vulnerable to magic in this form" said Okita, smiling "But we also happen to be most powerful now"

They were human. Saitoh's golden eyes sparkled as he drew his sword, examining it as Okita grinned at our friends. Misao's eyes went wide. "No I'm not the one you seek" Okita babbled quickly, his dark eyes gleaming, hoping that Misao wouldn't get any ideas. But she wasn't looking at him. She was looking at Aoshi. "You…" she said, "You are my prince" Aoshi looked at her, the expression in his eyes unreadable. But before any of them could do anything, a tiny cough emanated from the trees around. All of them stiffened, who was this?

Funnily enough, even Aoshi seemed startled. Saitoh and Okita reached for their swords, while Sano wondered how much like a wolf Saitoh still looked. Misao kept looking at Aoshi, wondering how best she could kiss him. Aoshi scanned the woods, and was about to open his mouth when a slender figure stumbled out, with a cloud of red hair and wearing funny clothes. The figure stopped, confused, and spotting them, gave them a big smile. They stared back, shocked. No one had expected this to happen.

* * *

Suspense, suspense, suspense! Who do you think the red-head is? So, I've revealed plenty in this chapter. Aoshi is the man and Saitoh and Okita turn human. Stay with me! This story will end soon! Read and review please!

To lolo popoki: It's actually 'Age of mythology' one of my all time favorite games! I loved your review, as always!

To sueb262: Thank you for your review!

To Rurouni-maxi: Here's Okita! So you can stop worrying! Keep reviewing!

To IKnowNot: I'm sorry, the first chap is really sucks, do you like this one?

To animefreakgal456: Hi! Thanks for reviewing! It's doesn't matter if you were late!

Thank you to everyone who's reviewed!


	10. You're the red head?

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Woo hoo! Chapter 10! Double digit! Heh heh….the cliffy sucks as usual, but…

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any of its characters. But how I wish I could own the Peacemaker Kurogane version of Okita…. (Drools uncontrollably)

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** Snap out of it, ahou. And start typing.

**Aurora Whisperwind:** You're so mean! Okita's so much nicer than you! Why, o why does he die all alone? Why does he die anyway? I want him to live! I want it, I want it! (Begins raving)

**Okita:** There there, it's okay…. Dying isn't that bad. After all, to live is to die and-

**Aurora Whisperwind:** (Snapping out of it) and to die is to live…

**Both start chanting:** The pure are soiled; and the soiled are pure-

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** SHUT UP AND START TYPING BLOODY WOMAN! AND YOU COPIED THAT OFF KIKYOU!

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Oooh look, I'm a woman! Neways, read on! And, Okita here is the PMK one, with the long gorgeous hair and the incredible eyes and the-

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** I'm warning you one last time…

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Sorry! Okay, to put it all in a jingle;

'He's so pretty

Oh so pretty

He's so pretty

And witty

And uh…straight!'

**Saitoh Bloodlust:** This thing is rated K, you know?

**Okita:** "…."

**Disclaimer:** (Again) I own nothing! Not the songs or Kikyou or anything else! Spare me!

* * *

The red-head paused and gave them a simpering smile. "Hi!" she chirped, "I'm Nancy Drew! I'm a detective! I'm really cool! I mean I can, you know, fight, skate, dance, ski, swim, scuba dive, drive, parachute, sing, play any musical instrument and in short, I can do anything better than anyone else! I'm really pretty too! All the cool guys fall for me! But I don't always fall for them you know, my heart belongs to Ned and to Ned alone!" She produced a handsome puppet. "Say hi, Ned! He's really great looking, no? He helps me with all my cases! My friends help me too!" she moved aside to reveal two dogs. A sleek wolfhound and a golden retriever. "George and Bess! They help too! But mostly I'm the one who solves everything with my calm clear thinking and brilliant deduction which earned me my international reputation! But I'm always modest!"

Silence followed this speech. Okita was the only one to speak, as the rest were staring incredulously at her. "Um…so what are you doing here?" The girl's gaze snapped onto him, and she shrieked. Covering the puppet's eyes, she commanded to the dogs "Get her! She's too pretty to be wandering around like that! Ned _might_ just look at her that way!" The dogs growled and pounced on Okita, who was too busy trying to figure out what she said to defend himself. Luckily, Saitoh came to his rescue.

Pretty soon, Nancy, her puppet and the two dogs were tied to a tree. Aoshi decided to question them. "So, what are you doing here?" Nancy struggled a little, and then replied "We heard of this prince guy who was trapped in a tower, so we came here to try and save him! You may be a handsome man, but I'm sorry, I'm not available…the prince is supposed to have red hair, just like me! Though mine is nicer! My hair is reddish-blond, or ginger, or carroty, or auburn, or flame-colored or…."

Aoshi almost moaned in misery. "SHUT UP, WILL YOU, YOU INEPT GIRL!" Nancy stopped talking and gave him an injured look. "You're not nice" she pouted, "I know! You're the evil guy here! My astoundingly brilliant logic tells me that! Oh no, don't try to deny it! I've caught many criminals! My experience-" Everyone sweat-dropped. Saitoh looked at everyone and smirked. "Maybe you could help us" he drawled "We're going there too, you know. We need someone of your _caliber_…you can have the prince. The reason we're going there is to claim the castle"

Nancy looked at him suspiciously. "Well alright" she said stiffly "But on condition that you keep that pretty girl away from my Ned" Okita looked like he'd contradict her and assure her that he was a guy, but Saitoh flung his arm around his mouth, and nodded an assent. Kaoru and Misao were boiling with rage that this girl didn't even consider them competition (hem hem, Misao?), while Sano and Yahiko-in-boots watched with interest mixed with disgust. Aoshi looked slightly dazed; this was not the fight he had been expecting. "So we have a truce now, right?" asked Saitoh looking at Aoshi. "What truce? You can't pass until you beat me!" Aoshi declared. "Okay then, do your bit, frog girl" Saitoh said, moving aside and dragging Okita with him. Misao squealed with joy and hopped straight to Aoshi, who watched her warily.

"Wanna join us, Aoshi-sama?" asked Misao, hearts in her eyes. Aoshi stuttered something in reply, he felt weird around this frog. "Um... yes why not?" he stammered. Kaoru hurried to Saitoh while Sano and Yahiko-in-boots went to untie Nancy and her group. "Saitoh! What were you thinking, inviting her to join us?" she snarled at him, while Okita struggled to free himself from Saitoh's iron grip. Saitoh smirked "Weeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllll, we do need someone to distract the dragon and to offer as sacrifice….." Okita gasped inaudibly. Kaoru smirked back, an evil look spreading over her face.

"Okay now, Okita. You're a girl" Saitoh said, finally letting him go "It's not that hard to pretend to be one, with looks like yours…" Okita pouted. "I don't want to be one! In fact I'm going to go and tell that girl now!" he marched off, but Saitoh held him back. "Idiot! Do you think someone with such little intelligence will actually believe you? I told you we'll feed her to the dragon, right? So stay put and pretend to be a woman!"

So they all set off again, the others pretending not to hear about Nancy's last case. Until at a point were it got unbearable. "Hey Busu!" Yahiko asked, "I'm hungry, could you make something for us?" Okita, who was pretending to be a devout Japanese girl and who was walking with his head down, crashed into Saitoh when the latter stopped in sheer horror. Kaoru smiled at Yahiko, understanding his plan. "So that we eat all my delicious food and starve those morons?" Sano smacked his forehead. "No, missy! We meant to kill-" Yahiko clamped a hand over Sano's mouth and said "Oh no, Kaoru! We may be bad, but we certainly have no right to deprive others of your magnificent cooking!" Saitoh chimed along "Oh yes! It would be torture, not eating that slice of heaven!"

Kaoru beamed at all of them, and prepared something to eat with everyone's help. She didn't notice that all of them listened to her with no complaint or that all of them took their meals aside to 'cool'. Misao decided to save Aoshi the pain, so she instructed him to do exactly what they all did.

There is no need to mention what happened to their unwanted guests.

* * *

Aurora Whisperwind: Oookaaaaaay…. That was short but… I hope not bad? This story is coming to an end soon, what do you think of this chappie? I know it is a gross breach of rules, bringing Nancy Drew into the story, but as Saitoh said, someone has to be fed to the dragon…and I happen to HATE HER! I HATE HER LIKE HELL! I'm really, honesty sorry if I disappointed any of you, but…

To my reviewers,

**To lolo popoki: **Yay! You liked the way Kaoru's cooking came to use! It came into some use in this chapter too! Thank you for reviewing!

**To Rurouni-maxi: **Shikijo? No way! I said slender! And about the bears… (Blushes) I'll set it right! Thank you for pointing that out!

**To sueb262:** I hope you don't find this chapter stupid? Please keep reviewing!

**To Phantom of blood:** One day, I hope to have an entire sentence for a review from you…

To butterfly87: actually, if Kaoru was the princess, it would have been predictable…

To Mitsuki Himura: Thank you for your review! It was really sweet!

Please read and review! And please don't flame me for my inept choice of characters!


	11. The penultimate chappie

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Hi! I've decided to finish this ficcie! One more chapter to go! On a side-note, Nancy drew and her friends are Mary-sues. Really. Read her books and find out if you like.

**Mary-sue**- A Mary Sue is a fan created character, usually representing the author, with a story built around her. She's perfect. She can do _anything_. And most irritating.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any of its characters.

* * *

The journey seemed even more never ending now, as Nancy developed a case of I-can't-stop-talking-about-myself, a side effect from uh, _someone's_ cooking. Considering she already had a bad case of that, double dose was unbearable. Forced to listen, the troop listened to her fighting with alligators, swinging across lakes, unearthing magical swords, brewing dangerous potions, flying to Jupiter, saving Pluto from flying pink and red trees and numerous other exploits. They were very glad she was going to be gobbled soon.

Saitoh's face went from hopelessly uninterested to alert after a while though, as he sniffed the air. "Brimstone" he muttered, "we are close". Okita tried to look terrified and vulnerable, failing miserably. Sure enough, the group tensed, ignoring Nancy's ranting as they approached Megumi's lair.

"So what's the plan?" Okita whispered to Saitoh, "How are we going to distract the monster? And I don't mean the dragon!" Said heir of the bloodlust clan smirked and muttered, "We're just hoping Megumi will be attracted to anything with red hair. Or long hair. Or both. Or maybe all she'll be attracted to are feminine looking men. Maybe she really likes to collect their hair. Maybe that's what keeps her scaly skin glowing" he tugged at the boy's hair, and watched Okita's terrified, wide-eyed expression as the former fairy whimpered _'Not my hair. Anything but my hair'. _Saitoh laughed out loud, prompting Okita to snap out of his trance and try to mash his tormentor flat, effectively drawing Nancy's attention to them.

"So, she's your girlfriend! So my next victim, er lover, is you! I'm going to make you see how miserable you've been with that pale, good for nothing, frail girl! You will worship the goddess of coolness that I am! Ahahahahahahaha! " she screeched, pointing at Saitoh, who's face went paler than Aoshi's trench coat. Okita's knees buckled, and he fell to the ground, face in his hands, whether he was laughing or crying, they didn't know. Sano, Yahiko, Kaoru and Misao when convulsed in giggles and even Aoshi smirked at the proud duo, the heir of the bloodlust clan, and his magically endowed partner.

Nothing in the world could beat Saitoh bloodlust in battle, except maybe himself. Saitoh along with Okita was an even greater challenge, and Aoshi doubted if he and the dragon together could beat them. That was not all, though. They were polite, intelligent, powerful, devious, and well known for their kingdom snatching tactics. _Now they're a couple. _Aoshi sniggered again. This was a good day after all.

"WHAT?" Saitoh yelled, finally getting a hold on himself, "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?" Nancy shook her head. "Darling" she said slowly, slithering up to Saitoh, who backed away like he'd been stung, hand on the hilt of his sword, fighting the impulse to cut her head off, "don't you see that I'm the one for you? Look at me! I'm so amazing! Don't you like me better?" she shrieked as someone slapped her out of the way, and even Aoshi looked shocked as Okita glowered down, snarling "NOBODY INSULTS SAITOH-SAMA AND GET'S AWAY WITH IT" at the equally pissed off red head. Saitoh looked surprised as well, and was quick to intervene however, if Okita killed her, they'd lose their trump card.

And sure enough, the 'fairy wolf brother' looked like he well would, losing all his usual girlish tendencies. "My uh… girlfriend, kindhearted that she is, will spare your life now" Saitoh drawled, taking Okita with him, ignoring the boy's spluttering. "Or…" Nancy yelled after them, "I'm kindhearted to spare hers. She'll die if she came in my way. I have like the blackest of black belts in every martial art ever invented!" Okita struggled again to get back and rip her head off, but Saitoh bonked him on the head, and dragged him away out of sight to a clump of trees.

Silence.

"So does this mean they're a couple?" asked Sano who had regained consciousness by now, while the other three still lay twitching with laughter. A blade came flying through the woods and hit the tree very, very close to Sano's head. "And that was a warning shot" snarled a voice.

Aoshi smirked again.

* * *

Author's note: Where is this going? It's like the story is running away from me… oh well, next and last chappie, the dragon! All together now,

'Saitoh and Okita sitting on a tree

K-I-S-S-I-'

KABONG

Please read and review!


End file.
